The Marvel Studios logo flashes on the screen. Danny Elfman’s operatic and charged score sounds off with thundering horns. One simple but compelling word appears: HULK. A five-year-old Gabe Theis digs into his seat, prepared for a spectacle of superhero action and epic mayhem.
And then… a jellyfish? Some guy with a pornstauche cuts up a starfish as green, comic-sans credits flash on the screen. Pornstauche man proceeds to experiment on some frogs and other banal wildlife. What the hell does this have to do with “The Hulk?”
Oh, it’s Bruce Banner’s egomaniacal mad-scientist father. Who starts experimenting on himself and ends up passing his genetic mutations onto his son, Bruce. Um, what? How long is this backstory going to take? Was the whole “gamma-radiation” thing not a good enough explanation for Ang Lee?
These are the sorts of questions that plagued my initial viewing experience of Hulk, and I wasn’t alone in my disappointment. The disorienting editing, the slow-burn pace, and the ultra-melancholy tone didn’t just alienate me, but comic-book fans everywhere. Since its release and infamous second-weekend box-office drop of 70%, Ang Lee’s Hulk has remained one of the most notorious misfires for both comic-book adaptations and for Lee’s own career. He would stage a comeback with Brokeback Mountain, thankfully so. But if you were a child in the aughts, Ang Lee was probably known to you as the guy who made that sad-ass Hulk movie that spends more time photographing moss and shrubs than the Hulk himself.
A Hulk who hasn’t aged particularly well, special-effects-wise. And honestly, the CGI didn’t impress audiences much back then either.
So after the Hulk has been portrayed on-screen with far more acclaim and far more appreciation from fans, it seems like Ang Lee’s misguided foray into superhero cinema would just be an awkward footnote. Who would like this movie? Weirder yet, who would take the time to defend it, especially when they hated it so much as a kid?
Hmm.
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